for you will never be replaced;

Wednesday, February 08, 2006
6:14 PM

dear diary and friends,
time,6:18 and here i am at cine, E-max, the new lanshop here. so cold and so cozy, a place to be in when your down or maybe when your up up and up! haha okay, i know i sound crazy but i'm actually feeling so alive becus i've done something i'm proud of. heh ;) guess my girlfriends should be proud of me too. finally i'm out of the damn relationship that i've struggled for long.. now i am free again! hehe ;) but i still need plenty of time to get over lots of stuffs. but i believe i will pull thru this phase, at least i will never let a guy to pull me down. NO WAY! heh i love being this way and i love what i've decided. =) so thank you GOD and of cos my dearest girlfriends for supporting me throughout. Of cos, thank you Vincent for being there too. =) you got to be strong yourself ya!

hmm results are coming out this friday.. Gosh so damn fast!!! I wish all of you the very best =)
GOD bless all~ :)

no words can express
my love for you

Saturday, January 14, 2006
1:01 AM

hey guys and dearest diary,
first of all, my apologies for not blogging for such a long time. my com has been down and i'm at my cousin's place, sleepover tonight so got this opportunity to update my blog. :) Well, its about 2 weeks since the new year and happy 2006 to all of ya!
The last few weeks of my 2005 sucked and even till this day, my life has been somewhat down. I'm despair about the break-up and drowned myself in work and school. In case some of ya do not know, i'm actually having the 3months j.c trial at the Millennia Institute. Its full of zestfulness and fun during the orientation and i'm real happy to have met friends like Fang yi and also became closer to Tjie Siew. =) Though the mass lectures were kinda tough and boring, but i will go to school for knowledge and for ya, Tjie Siew. haha.
I would love to take this opportunity to thank Cindy and Sammie, my two lovely girlfriends for going through this period of time with me. Of cos, I will not leave you out, that is my 'husband', Abhisek, for being here with me too. And also, Tjie Siew and my sweetest cousin, Grace. Thank you all for going through this break-up and breakdown with me. Without you all, I guessed I would still be as foolish and silly. Thank you so much. :)
The pain in my heart is a torment that I'm going through now. Forgive me for everything, the mistakes and all but think about it, have you been here for me all this while? Afterall that we've been through and all that I've put into this relationship of ours, you could just forgo everything because of that very incident. I can't hold back my tears no more. You will never know how much pain i'm going through, right here alone. Sometimes, I wish i never were to meet you...
But, still i would carry you in my heart.. Take Care........

no words can express
my love for you

Thursday, September 29, 2005
5:36 PM

dear diary,
sorry for not updating for ages. hehe the prelims just ended and now its one month to the major o'levels! ;) well, this time round its not a feeling of anxiousness but don't know why i can't wait for the exams to arrive so soon and i can't wait till 22nd Nov 05! haha cos it the last paper of the o'lvls! woohoo! =) now we must all buck up and score so well. hehe wish you all the very best! =) muacks.
currently, i'm at Cindy's house with Sammie now. hehe sammie is a pest. argh soooooo noisy. sigh, we miss someone who belongs to us. baby, if you are reading this, i do hope you are good and please come back to us soon yea! four of us is better than 3 ya? :) hmm, too long never update blog somehow like no inspiration. :( sorry if this post bore you readers ya? hehe btw, i hope the handsome guy who looks like Julian He will appear infront of my bestie, Cindy's eyes again! haha baby, i wish you so much love soon! love you babes-sammie,cindy&me! haha and you, kelvin! =)

God bless. ++ i'm missing you++
esse:)

no words can express
my love for you

Wednesday, September 07, 2005
7:11 PM

A tribute to the people who make a difference in my life

A special entry specially going out to you guys. I decided to have it named, “A tribute to the people who make a difference in my life,” because I think that we humans often neglect our loved ones around us or either only wait till special occasions to let the person know how much he meant to us in our hearts, but I want to take this opportunity to pen down my feelings and sentiments towards the people who make a difference in my life. Hope you guys will enjoy reading it. :)

31st Aug 2005
As I woke up this morning, I was feeling refreshed and was eager to get to school immediately as I got a big aim on this very day, because it’s teacher’s day! I want to hug all my beloved teachers and let them know how much I appreciate them all this while and yeah, I did hug a few of my teachers just when I reached school that morning. Hehe it was such a sweet thing to do early in the morning, don’t you agree? ;) It’s my first “to-do item” of the day.

For teacher’s day, the students put up an amazing performance, like never before and the audiences as well as the teachers must have enjoyed it. My favourite item was the opening dance by Kelvin and Company and it was wonderful especially when my lovely Kelvin was in it. Hehe my baby you, you have no idea how good you were dancing on the stage, where it put me into so much excitement and it was perfect! Kelvin, remember the other day during Mother Tongue lesson, when I shared with the class about you being my idol and the whole class was somewhat agreeing with me? Baby, that’s from my heart and I always believed that you should maximize that potential of yours to pursue being a great singer in future cos’ baby, you simply deserved to! A good-looking guy who’s talented and popular among his peers, Kelvin certainly is one good catch that every girl would love to have. =)

After the concert, we were all ready for the ACES day workout and if you were there experiencing the fun, you would have never thought the whole school was so full of participation and energy. Everyone was so spontaneous and we were all crossing our arms to work out on the part, where we did the “leg-kicking” movement, which my class named it the “Andrew’s Specialty.” You must see how funny he does that movement. It’s like a stiff body with his little legs moving – a human toy! Wahaha ;p Well, ask him and he will show it to you peeps! Hehe *;) It was indeed a beautiful day in school. Happy Teacher’s Day! =)

30th Aug 2005
Needless to say, I woke up with a wide smile and a lovely mood this particular day because it’s humpty dumpty’s day and the start of it was one of sweetness, totally perfect moment. Haha sounds interesting yeah? Well, it was at 12 mid-night, where I received a phone call from this guy, who asked me to open my room windows and as I did, I saw him out there with his usual gorgeous smile that makes my heart smile naturally, and asking me to get out of my house so quickly.

Hehe that moment was so incredible as I myself, could not have believed that a guy would appear before me, when the clock strike alarming that its 12 mid-night, signaling the start of my birthday. :) No words or actions could actually describe how I felt at that instance but a little warmth hug to thank him for such sweet doings. To the special you, thanks for giving me such an awesome start of my birthday. You make me feel that I am a piece of treasure in your heart, am I? Haha oops ;p

As I reached school that morning, I saw my brother Terence outside the school gate and received a handshake from him. After which, it was Sammie, who waited outside the office for me and there she gave me a hug to wish me too. Aww~ thanks baby!

^. ^ Initially, I thought it will be like any other day, where I head to school for lessons, get home after school, sleep and the usual routine of my daily life hence, I was in a normal mood but it wasn’t for long because I have a bunch of adorable class/schoolmates who made my day into a remarkable and fantastic one. =]

I’d never forget that moving scene when my class, 5C, sang me the birthday song together with Miss Goi and Miss Soo. It was rather sweet of them to have allowed such warmth scene to happen then. Moreover, what adds on more impact was when Sheena sang me the Chinese version of the birthday song and guess what? She was on her knees as she sang it, as though she was proposing to me! Haha she got all the words right and thank goodness, she did not pronounce the first sentence, “zhu ni shen ri kuai le,” with the “zhu” the pronunciation that meant a pig. Haha;) I really appreciated it all, my dear Sheena and my dearest classmates. Thank you so much, it means a lot to me! =)

After school that day, Christy’s gang was kidnapping me as they planned to get a ransom from my family. Haha but this kidnapping was done in a different style as of cos, I was not tied up and I chose to follow them around. Haha I am a good target to be kidnapped yeah? * Touchwood * Hehe but, if you are a kidnapper please do think twice before kidnapping me because I am actually a pauper and it will be your great loss. Haha;) By the way, they made me wait for them sitting outside the office for God knows how long and hello, on my birthday?! ARGH!! What is this man?! Haha just teasing. ;p

However, it was worth waiting, as I received a bunch of three big heart-shaped balloons from the 3 babes, Christy, Wiki and Sammie. The balloons were cute and lovely. But hey, these girls actually stole it from the school hall decoration for the teacher’s day celebration the day after. Haha but stealing for me was nothing bad actually. Haha oops ;) All of which, have words written from them and they were words of wisdom and absolutely written from within their hearts. Thank you babes:) [Christy, I will beat those boobies one of these days] Heh

Then, we proceeded to the destination, of which I thought it would be a secluded place for me to be bashed up. Haha I was fearless though cos it tuned out to be a restaurant filled with nice ambience and atmosphere – The Swensen’s. I was indeed lucky to be kidnapped by them because not only do I get great attention but also they even treated me to fabulous food oh food! Hehe heaven baby! ;) But, you guys actually forgot that I had to finish up 2 glasses of water for my punishment of getting the right number during the guessing game. Haha I escaped it! WOOHOO!! =p

In the midst of eating, both my God-brothers, Jon and Limwei, came to look for me to send me their wishes and they joined in to eat at the opposite table of ours. Having their presence there was a great contentment as well as fulfillment because they combined the warmth together with my friends. How nice can it be ya? ;)

To Jon, thanks for remembering my birthday ever since my 13th birthday. It definitely means a lot to me, a lot! =]

To Limwei, thanks that I need not send a drunkard home this time round. ;) Hehe thanks for standing by me all the times when I needed someone to.

To Terence, although we have not been talking much to each other lately, but I have to let you know that you are one person that has become such an important person in my life. The letter you gave me on my previous birthday, and your frequent trips to and fro the hospital whilst I was hospitalized then, made me treasure you even more. I always can’t find the right words to say to you but in actuality, you do mean a lot in my heart. Thanks for being a part of me. =)

To Jianzhi, meimei always loved having you around cos’ you adore me so much. Hehe I love being pat pat on the head and calling me “little fatty!” I’d never forget those cherished days we shared, you dried my hair when we were caught in the rain, you carried me running to Terence’s house while I was having severe stomach cramps out of a sudden and many more sweet moments we had, were unforgettably beautiful.

To Yaoyong, my Mos-burger God-bro, I’ve always enjoyed our going out days together. And “smooth hands!” hehe;)
I’m so thankful for God send me you brothers to adore, protect me and to take care of me. But, minus off the part when you guys bully me. Hehe ;p love you all. –Brother&Sisterhood always!! =)

All rights, I guess I shall go back to the Christy’s gang or else you guys will complain that I am biased. Hehe despite, enjoying out feast, as usual we took thousands and one photos. Haha the celebration ended with the cake they chose for me, yummy chocolate cake, and with the complimentary firehouse ice-cream dish from the restaurant itself. Aww~ it was a marvelous time! Thank you buddies! =]

In addition, I was given 2 pecks of kisses on both my cheeks, the left one from Wiki, and the right one from Sammie, while we were posing for the photo taking. Haha I was not only flabbergasted but I’m touched too. Hehe but if only the kiss was from the Eurasian guy, that would be WOW, HEAVEN OH HEAVEN! Heheheh I’m not asking for too much, am I? ;p But, having to take a snapshot with him is yet enough. Hehe thanks to the courtesy of my bestie, Cindy’s camera again! =]

I felt like a superstar that very day because everyone was snatching to take snapshots with me and with the bunch of balloons in my hands, how can I not feel special yeah? Hehe;) I had a simply perfect day!

My dearest friends, who celebrated for me, are none other than Cindy, Christy, Sammie, Wiki, Sheena, Marilyn, Tiffany, Jonathan Teo and the guy who nicknamed himself, “Sexy Dragon,” thanks so much for making birthday a meaningful event and for inputting so much happiness in me. My apologies for making you guys spent a bomb on me for the feast. =( Heh I really enjoyed myself and I truly felt the sincerity in all of you. Throughout the years in Monk’s Hill, I never had a lonely birthday but all that filled me with surprises year after year. You guys complete my last year’s birthday having to experience in school. Seriously, not a word perfect could describe how I felt. Thanks a million, dearest! =)

Lastly, to those of whom, called to send me wishes, sent me messages through friendster, e-mailed me, or smsed me, or wished me personally, I can’t be thankful enough to you guys, for having the sincere thought as well as your warmest greetings. :)

To my family, thanks for the gifts and the love we always share. I can’t imagine what will my life be without having you guys. :)
May happiness be with you all always, to soar in life with successes, and to live in the wealth of healthiness, are what I wished for before I blew out the candles. And of cos’, to have WORLD PEACE! =) Love you all so much. God bless you all.

~ Your kindness was appreciated right from the start. Please accept the thanks deep from my heart. ~
~ Thank you for the treasure of your friendship, for showing me God’s special heart of love. ~
~ What brings joy to the heart is not so much the friend’s gifts as the friend’s love. ~
~ Like ice cream, our friendship has so many flavors! And some day I hope to return all your favors! ~

Forever love,
Esther

no words can express
my love for you

Thursday, August 04, 2005
2:22 PM

dear diary, its been close to a week since i last update on my blog. for now, we are left with 42 days to our prelims and 95 days to our o'lvls. ;( heh but i shall share with you guys about an interesting account that happened during class time today. hee as you all know the GHOST festival is arriving- tonight 12am! haha and our class was so excited about it or shall i say crazy about it? Hello its just another normal day yet it seems as if after tonight, everything will change into a scary and frightening sight! heh

We had 3periods of F&N lessons today and all 3 were relief by different teachers. The 1st period was Ms Nor, where we had an amazing lesson on the essay so powerfully written about the parallels of the nature in conjuction with Beethoven's Symphony. Its was beautifully written. :) The 2nd period we had Ms Au, where we chatted about life and all. I miss her! & the excitement came when we had Ms Goi to relief us for the 3rd period. well, we thot it will be yet another talking session or rather self-revision period but guess what? we had a nice time frightening Sheena and the whole plan was certaintly enjoyable and we laughed till our hearts' content. haha that scene was crazy. Jaffar&Manoj were like taking the mop and stuck into the damn statue or what they called, "the maid!" hahaha then they placed it right at the door with all the rooms' lights switched off and awaiting for Sheena's return from the toilet. hehe and when she came, she screamed as what we thought and gosh we even had Manoj to hide and we pretended that he was around us. haha Sheena was freaked out- shivering like mad! haha we had a real good laughing time. If the whole class was there, the room will be filled with even louder laughter. heh

Sorry Sheena, but we had a real good time! hehe but whatever it is, there's is nothing to be afraid of so relax and don't worry. Just remember do not look into the mirror! wahaha oops! hehe alrights, Cindy waiting for me. Gtg. have so much fun and Happy Birthday to Singapore! =) God bless ~

no words can express
my love for you

Friday, July 29, 2005
1:02 PM

dear diary, christy is beside me now. she's cheeky wants me to introduce her handsome guys. wahaha. i shld intro STEVEN to her instead. hehehehe ;))))))) i'm in school now. heh my chatterbox everytime got probs one. argh~ huhus. heh the weekends are coming but i have to work gosh! cries* kekes. maybe i take MC again. heheh

well, this week has been a good week for me, i supposed! ever since the band concert, i can't wait to make my hair curly so soon! hahaha but seriously i look good in it yea? hehe *thick-skinned* as usual!! haha hmm i went to chocolate bar after the concert with chirsty, cindy, wiki & wendy! hey, 2 Cs, 2 Ws and me the E! haha its been long since i dance to the beat of r&b songs and gosh i love it!! thou we spent about 45mins there only, but i had a real good time. Apart from it, i saw zhiyin and eugene heng and we had a little chat. and that raymond! never really spoken to me! argh~ hmm then i had my friend, adrain, to send me home and afterwhich, i showered and my curly hairs are gone! then i went to lalaland and next thing to school! - 5hrs of slp! ;(

the day after, i went to CIndy's house after school and didn't have my tuition! so u know what? tuition is on tonight! and my friday is gone just like that! huhu. =( hmm not much assignments to be done but i do have lots of revision cos' 48days to prelims and 100days to 0'lvls. that makes it 122days to holidays! hehe ;) ahh i gotta get down to work and then fun fun fun. yea yea yea~~~
alrights, have fun buddies and luvv ya! "muack"ss",)" esse>>>

no words can express
my love for you

Wednesday, July 27, 2005
8:56 PM

26th July 05 -- mhmb concert -- curly hair, nice?- sponsored by Cindy! haha thanx babe! ;)

no words can express
my love for you